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Post by gazelle18 on Oct 18, 2016 22:45:46 GMT -5
What's on your mind - how to make kugel? This week's Torah reading? Life goals? Prayer? We are all engaged in weight loss/weight management journeys and we are all Jewish or at least interested in Judaism. We like to eat, we like to discuss. It is our goal here is to provide each other support on our journeys, to share experiences, to call on our rich cultural heritage and texts, and to help each other grow spiritually.
Some of us take weekly turns starting the thread:
Angelika
Holly
Lee
Louise
Lynne
Peachy
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Post by gazelle18 on Oct 18, 2016 23:03:17 GMT -5
Hi everyone,
Thanks for all the nice bday wishes!! What a perfect addition to a lovely day!
We are talking this week about autumn, and aging. Autumn, my favorite season, reminds me of the rewards of aging. We have made it through the darkness of winter, the folly of youth (spring), the hard work of summer, and get to reap the rewards of the gorgeous weather and spiritual clarity that come with the autumn months.
One thing I like about being this age is that I have the absolute luxury to laugh at myself. "You don't stop laughing when you grow old; you grow old when you stop laughing." (GB Shaw)
In that vein, here is one of my favorite sayings about aging: "Aging is the reward you receive for surviving your own stupidity."
Can you relate a story of something you did when you were younger which was utterly stupid, about which you can now laugh? My youthful stupidity knew no bounds, so I have quite a few examples. Here is just one:
I used to think that life would be better if I lost weight, or found the perfect outfit, or changed to a perfect new hairstyle. When I was newly married and in law school, I decided I NEEDED to change my straight lanky hair to short and REALLY curly (think Little Orphan Annie). One of my friends had adopted this faddish style and she looked cool, so... Well, I looked like a clown! It was hideous! I was so mortified that I locked myself in the bathroom and it took my DH two hours to coax me out. It was priceless to see him to try not to laugh when I finally unlocked the door. Boy did I learn a lesson that day about being true to who I am!!
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lee058
This space for rent
Posts: 23,269 
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Post by lee058 on Oct 19, 2016 8:03:20 GMT -5
Good morning everybody. Hope you are all well today. I'm fine except that I am still sleepy although I've been up for a couple of hours. I need more coffee. It looks like DS will be going back on the early morning shift, starting Saturday, ugh. Well, you do what you have to do, and I will drive him to and from work as long as it is necessary! I'm just glad that he has this job.
Something utterly stupid that I did when younger was to hitchhike a lot. When I look back at it, I shudder. How could I have been so reckless? Thank God I never had any terrible situations.
I have to call DS's boss today, and I bet he is going to ask me if I can get DS to work at 5AM instead of 6AM. Ugh. I really hope not.
I'll be back later. Have a peaceful day, Lee
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Post by louise on Oct 19, 2016 9:38:25 GMT -5
Follies of vanity - things that seem so silly now were so important when I was younger - having the dress, getting into the dress, a bad hair day. In college I actually ironed my hair - today I am so glad I found a style that works with my natural curl (and I love it!). I remember always feeling like if I was thin I would be happy or I would be able to cope with this or that - as if thin people don't have problems! Sadly, there were points in my life that I was a reasonable size and just thought that I was fat.
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Post by savtele on Oct 19, 2016 9:49:51 GMT -5
Boker Tov All! Lee, I also hitchhiked - around the country and around town. NOW, I'm surprised I'm still alive!
Another stupid thing I used to do was drink to excess & dance all night long. To this day - I can barely walk when sober, but after a few drinks, I can dance up a storm! (yes, that was me on the dance floor, doing the twist with my daughter & our friend K at my grandson's wedding) But I've learned that drinking to excess is not good for me - I don't like how I feel during and after - and I really do want to keep my liver. So I've instituted a 1:1 rule - 1 full glass of water between drinks (including wine) Yes - I'm in the bathroom quite a bit of the time.....
The weather today is beautiful - next storm isn't expected till this evening! John is taking the tarps off our sukkah. Pool ladies are coming for pot-luck brunch. (ok, the sukkah looks more like a shed - there's no decoration, but there are lights! I'm bringing in the squashes that I bought & some leaves, lulav & etrog & the coffee pot) I'm heading out to start the fire in the chiminea - it will help dry it out & then radiate heat while we are all in there. Mimosas in the sukkah!
BTW, I read everyone's discussion of kiddush with great interest yesterday! I love how these multi-millenium-long discussions are revisited, in every generation, in every place!
Have a good day everyone!
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lee058
This space for rent
Posts: 23,269
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Post by lee058 on Oct 19, 2016 12:30:08 GMT -5
Quick note: DS's new schedule is 6-11AM, four days a week with three days off (20 hours a week). This is great! I am very proud of him. Hopefully in the future he will be able to work up to more hours, but this is fabulous for now. Got to go; be back later. Have a peaceful rest of the day, Lee
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Post by hollygail on Oct 19, 2016 23:47:45 GMT -5
Oy, I'm gonna sound like a goody two shoes... I hitch hiked, but only with someone (male), I didn't drink to excess (I can count the number of times in my life that I've been drunk on the fingers of one hand and still have fingers left over), I tried some items that weren't/aren't legal but never got "hooked," I smoked cigarettes but never more than half a pack a day and never more than about eight months out of the year (and stopped altogether more than 40 years ago, maybe 45), I didn't purposely straighten my wavy hair, I didn't think I'd be happier if I were thinner or taller or blonde or other physical things, I rarely studied much and did well in school (okay, I studied in one class where I hated the subject matter and wasn't good in it)... I had lots of dates in high school (married my college sweetheart a year after starting college and finished my BA in 6 semesters and three summers), pretty much always wore "sensible" clothes and shoes... Don't hate me. I really am normal...
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Post by happysavta on Oct 20, 2016 0:03:03 GMT -5
Ok, you want to talk about duh-uh-dumb things we did in our foolish youth, eh?
I was particularly dumb about my expectations of the joys of motherhood when I was in my 20s. I decided I was going to be unbelievably fantastic at parenting. Living up to that dumb ideal nearly killed me.
The reality of a baby fussing for a solid hour, of smells that make you gag, of spit up, of getting pee'd on, of being so tired you can't move, of being hungry and not being able to sit down and finish a meal, of feeling tied to a chair feeding, of wishing "it" would shut up already, all this was at odds with my belief that I had found something I was really good at, near perfect, a model of motherhood.
To be a model mother, I stayed in the house all day because the baby slept best in his own crib, of course, where he could stretch out and turn around and had quiet and an even temperature. To be a model mother, I made sure the baby drank every bottle while being held and ate every meal at home, so the milk was warmed and the meal was hand mashed. I looked down my nose at mothers who pulled out cold bottles at bus stops. I wanted my parents and my husband and my inlaws to praise me loudly and often as a wonderful mother.
But what I really thought and what I really felt in my 20s about motherhood made me feel so guilty that I pushed it down with food. That was duh-uh-dumb. I was bored with baby's company, so I ate. I was irritated by the prolonged crying, so I ate. I was exhausted by all the work, so I ate. I was angry at the loss of freedom to get up and go, so I ate. Really stupid. The food dulled the feelings, but the feelings didn't go away. I just got bigger and more sluggish. By the time we got to baby #4 and all the challenges he presented, I was wishing I could just disappear.
One of the problems in my notion of being a perfect mother was that I had these imperfect children. They were dirty no matter how often I scrubbed them, they ate like little pigs, they fought with each other, they bit other children, they broke my pretty ceramic chatchskes, they were unruly in public, they talked back, they whined, they were disobedient. I thought that if I were really a perfect mother, they would have been much better children. Another duh-uh-dumb belief.
But somehow or other, the kids managed to survive me and I managed to survive the kids. I'm proud of them, and I'm proud of me too. I was actually a pretty good mother, not perfect, but really good at listening to them and encouraging them, and finding opportunities for them to experience new things. They have good memories of childhood. What else can you ask for?
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