Jewish Musings, Thursday, December 8, 2016

[peachymom1]

What’s on your mind – how to make kugel? This week’s Torah reading? Life goals? Prayer? We are all engaged in weight loss/weight maintenance journeys and we are all Jewish or at least interested in Judaism. We like to eat, we like to discuss. It is our goal here to provide each other support on our journeys, to share experiences, to call on our rich cultural heritage and texts, and to help each other grow spiritually.

Some of us take weekly turns starting the thread:

Angelika
Holly
Lee
Louise
Lynne
Peachy

[peachymom1]

Boker tov! Today I want to ask you about what it means to you to be religious. Think about the most religious person you know, of any faith. How does this person talk about God (or Whomever), interact with others, or dress and behave in religious ways? What does it mean to you to be religious, and what do you think it means to others? What do you think it should mean? Do you have an automatic response when you see someone dressed in a way that indicates their religion (e.g., a nun’s habit, a Chabad’s black coat, a Muslim woman’s hijab)? If so, what is your reaction, and what taught you or led you to react in this way?

In my opinion, to be religious means that a person believes and behaves according to a defined set of morals and ethics that are life-affirming and designed to promote harmony among people. I think that most people who identify themselves as religious are usually referring to an identity, not necessarily a moral way of life. We often assume that someone who looks religious (like a nun or a Chasid, for example) does follow a higher standard of behavior, but it’s not necessarily the case. Certainly, living in a religious community does lend itself to following the established rules more easily; it’s easier to keep kosher when your whole neighborhood and circle of friends/family does. But people are still people, and we’re going to make mistakes and be human no matter how conscientiously we try to live by the rules.

So it seems to me that it’s a matter of accountability. I think a truly religious person knows it when she stumbles or makes a poor decision, and tries to make it right. Everything else is just frills. We Jews have a lot of rules, but sometimes we get so entrenched in the minutiae that we forget what we were aiming for in the first place. That’s OK; we can always re-evaluate. I think that’s what it means to evolve as a people, and we certainly have been doing that for many centuries.

What does “religious” mean to you?

[lee058]

Good morning everybody. Hope you are all well today. This afternoon, I am going to see my endocrinologist. She will go over my most recent blood tests and check to see if I am all over the edema that I had in my legs/ankles this fall. I think I am all better, but I want to hear what she has to say.

Wow, what a good topic for today! However, I don't have a clue as to how I want to respond. I'll think about it and try and write something later.

I don't think of myself as being religious, although being Jewish is very important to me. I don't go to services or observe most holidays. However, I do spend a fair amount of time talking with DS about what it means to be Jewish, our people's history, our family history, and so on. He identifies with being Jewish and I think it will stick; I certainly hope so.

I hope to be back later; I'm looking forward to reading responses.

Have a peaceful day, Lee

[savtele]

Boker Tov All! Yesterday I ended up not going to the pool - the roads were icy, and even though the pool (on the main highway) was open, I didn't want to chance driving down our mountain with logging trucks and idiots who couldn't figure out that driving on ice is not a good thing! Yes, "those" people live out here - they know that their vehicle is a 4-wheel drive. (which basically just means that you have 4 wheels that are unable to stop sliding!)

I have a difficult time with "religious" people - in my mind that is synonymous with "judgmental" or in some way being looked down upon. The most spiritual people I know may or may not be particularly religious, but those who I consider only religious, without a deeper spiritual connection, turn me off completely. Then again, they may only be unable to define their spirituality to my understanding - which is, of course, totally unfair on my part!

Religiosity takes many forms. There is cultural identity, for one. As mentioned, if you live in a neighborhood where everyone keeps kosher, the markets cater to that, the elevators & electronic doors are set for Shabbat, the schul is within easy walking distance, etc.

Then again, some of my personally "most religious" acts may not seem religious at all to someone else. Polishing the brass shabbat candlesticks is, for me, a religious performance, as is giving charity or working with/for charity. Giving to the homeless by the freeway exits - always a religious act for me.

I do understand that any type of orthodoxy/fundamentalism cannot make much leeway for "new ideas" and still call itself "orthodoxy!" Then again - even as society moves headlong into new ideas & new norms, there must be some sort of give and take. I have mentioned before that I have given Blu Greenberg's book "How to Run a Traditional Jewish Household" to young people leaving home. I always write in it that "this is a starting point - incorporate what works for you now."

I found a box with many, many CDs in it - I'm going through them. How do CDs end up in a jacket not their own???

Have a good day ladies!

[hollygail]

Angelika, your "definition" of "religious" people differs considerably from mine... I know what you mean about judgmental behavior (and speech!) and what I'd call "looking down one's nose at" others. But I don't equate that with "religious." I, for example, am considered a "religious" person by many of my friends, yet I don't believe I'm judgmental, and I don't "look down my nose" at people who don't do what I do...

I teach Jewish values and I live by them. I teach ethics and only one very small example is this one: I help my chiropractor in his office. Originally, he asked me for 5 hours a week, and he writes me a check for 10 hours every two weeks. When I started helping him, no one had filed his patient files for probably a year, so there was always a lot of work to do (the current week's billing, the current week's new patient files, etc., plus a good chunk of back filing). However, as time went on, it became clear to me that he wasn't going to need me for 5 hours a week, so I approached him with the idea that as the backlog diminished, maybe I'd do closer to 3 hours (and 20 minutes) a week and he could pay me every three weeks. He understood what I meant. And of course he added one or two "new" (to me) tasks. Bottom line, if I haven't worked at least 9 hours in two weeks, I won't take home the check for 10 hours that week. I wait until I've worked 10 hours. (Yes, I'll take it home if I've worked more than 9 hours, but not if I've worked less.) To me, it's an ethical matter.

I'm also a spiritual person. I was spiritual long before I became religious. Perhaps that makes a difference, according to your (Angelika's) definition...

[louise]

Something about the word puts me off as well. Maybe like when someone does something "religiously" it means compulsively, or like clockwork. That meaning probably came about because that's the way religious people were perceived. It's odd - I know that I'm religious by which I mean observant, following the tenets of my faith.

Did I complain abut my right arm? Turns out I strained my right rotator cuff and have a long head of biceps tear (official jargon). Starting PT tomorrow.

[happysavta]

I'm going to respond to the portion of Peachy's question that asks, "Do you have an automatic response when you see someone dressed in a way that indicates their religion (e.g., a nun’s habit, a Chabad’s black coat, a Muslim woman’s hijab)? If so, what is your reaction, and what taught you or led you to react in this way?"

My grandson goes to a Hebrew language public charter school. One of the requirements is that he wear a school uniform. I like that a lot. It helps to level the playing field both in economic status and also in ethnic/religious origins. Nobody knows which child is Jewish and which is Christian.

If it were up to me, there would be no religious garb in the street. It's OK if you are in the yeshiva, the abbey, the nunnery, the temple or any the house of worship. But in the street or in the store, where I interact with you, I prefer not to have you identify by your religion. I don't want to see the hijab, the burka or the kippah or the turban unless you are a professional clergy person. I would much rather see all the civilians in civilians clothing. Let them wear their identifying clothing only when they are in religion-related building or at a religion based event. I believe all this religious garb divides people right off the bat before they have a chance to know each other.