jewish Musings , Monday 4/1

[louise]

What’s on your mind — how to make kugel? This week’s Torah reading? Life goals? Prayer? We are all engaged in weight loss/weight maintenance journeys and we are all Jewish or at least interested in Judaism. We like to eat, we like to discuss. It is our goal here to provide each other support on our journeys, to share experiences, to call on our rich cultural heritage and texts, and to help each other grow spiritually.

Some of us take weekly turns starting the thread:
Frieda (hopefully)?
Holly
Lee
Louise
Lynne
Peachy

And for those of you that stop by to read this thread without posting — you are welcome to, but you are also welcome to chime in. Don’t be shy!

[louise]

Ot's so late I thou ght I would just get us on the board. I'm about to make a marble cake - here's to no tasting!

[lee058]

Good morning everybody. Hope you are well and SAFE! Please pray for Israel.

louise, Thanks for starting the thread; I was delayed.

Today's topic: April Fool's Day.

How do you feel about April Fool's Day? To me, it signifies "practical jokes" and I don't like them. I think they are often mean-spirited and definitely not fun for the person who gets a prank pulled on them. In an advice column today, someone wrote in that her birthday was today, and she had had endless obnoxious jokes happen to her. That would be awful!

OTOH, today State Farm did something really nice for me (I hesitate to call it a joke)! Yesterday, I had problems with their app, for which I have to enter my car's mileage every month. Fortunately, this morning, everything worked out fine!! The app worked just the way it was supposed to. DS and I were extremely relieved, as last night was pretty awful.

What is there in Jewish tradition about jokes? Purim is famous for them, and of course there are many Jewish comedians, but what else can be added to our understanding? Please share.

Have a peaceful day, Lee

[peachymom1]

Ugh, I just got a phone call that I wish was an April fool -- apparently I committed to reading two aliyot this Shabbat, then forgot about it. The ritual director just called to remind me about it, and a faint bell started ringing in my head. Sure enough, I looked at my list, and yep, I did tell him I'd do it, when he asked me a few weeks ago. I've done these before, so it's not that hard, but I'm annoyed with myself for not keeping up.

I don't think practical jokes are funny, and I don't do them on other people. I like things that are funny or clever, not hurtful or obnoxious. I'm going to go make a cup of tea and take a 15-minute break to get busy on those Torah readings. Wish me luck!

[louise]

On a public radio talk show I listen to in the morning they were saying that starting January 2025 NYC would be ebikes only. Regular bikes would not be allowed on the streets becasue they canot keep up with traffic and therefore cause safety issues. They even had details about peopple being able to get special permits to keep their regular bikes to take on outoftown vacations, rebates for turning in your regular bike, etc. I was so busy being outraged by it,it didn't dawn on me until other people started to say something that it was an April Fool's joke.

[hollygail]

Jewish humor is wonderful. There are so many Jewish jokes I love, that I laugh at even after the umpteenth time hearing 'em. One I've loved for a VERY long time is this one.

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Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He'd have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy; if the Pope won, they'd have to convert or leave.

The Jewish people met and picked an aged and wise Rabbi to represent them in the debate.

However, as the Rabbi spoke no Italian, and the Pope spoke no Hebrew, they agreed that it would be a "silent"' debate.

On the chosen day, the Pope and the Rabbi sat opposite each other.

The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.

The Rabbi looked back and raised one finger.

Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. The Rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat.

The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine.

The Rabbi pulled out an apple.

With that, the Pope stood up and declared himself beaten and said that the Rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay in Italy!

Later the cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up a single finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. Finally, I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He bested me at every move and I could not continue!"

Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the Rabbi how he had won. "I don't have a clue!!!" the Rabbi said. "First, he told me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews, so I told him that we were staying right here."

"And then what?" asked a woman.

"Who knows..." said the Rabbi. "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine!"
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And the first time I heard a variation on this one, I think it may have become my all-time favorite. It doesn't matter how many variations I've heard, I love them all...

- - - - -
A catholic priest and a rabbi are old friends and decide to get lunch together. The priest is having a ham sandwich so he turns to the rabbi and asks him, “I was wondering; I know your religion prohibits pork, but have you ever tried it?”

The rabbi responds, “When I was a young man, I had a bit of an indiscretion and tried ham. It was delicious but I’ve never had it since.”

The two continue their meal. The rabbi tells the priest about his wife and kids and how well they’re doing. Suddenly he turns to the priest and says, “Forgive me for discussing my family, I know your religion prohibits you from having sex. I’ve wondered for some time though, have you ever tried it?”

The priest says to him, “That’s quite all right. In my youth I strayed from God and I too had an indiscretion. It was delightful but I’ve never done it since.”

The rabbi leans in close and says, “Better than ham, right?”
- - - - -

And I'll end with this one, which I came across very recently.

- - - - -
A friend was once told to "get in the Christmas spirit!"

He replied that he was Jewish.

She said "then get in the Chanukah spirit!"

He said, "The Chanukah spirit is the spirit of killing people who try to make us celebrate their holidays."
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