Jewish Musings, Friday/Shabbat, July 5-6, 2024

[peachymom1]

What’s on your mind — how to make kugel? This week’s Torah reading? Life goals? Prayer? We are all engaged in weight loss/weight maintenance journeys and we are all Jewish or at least interested in Judaism. We like to eat, we like to discuss. It is our goal here to provide each other support on our journeys, to share experiences, to call on our rich cultural heritage and texts, and to help each other grow spiritually.

Some of us take weekly turns starting the thread:

Frieda (hopefully)?
Holly
Lee
Louise
Lynne
Peachy

And for those of you that stop by to read this thread without posting — you are welcome to, but you are also welcome to chime in. Don’t be shy!

[peachymom1]

Hello everyone! I hope you had a relaxing / fun / safe 4th of July!

Exactly 47 years ago, DH and I met in a summer school geography class; I was about to start tenth grade, and he was going to be a senior. It took several weeks before we went out on an actual date; we went to Knott’s Berry Farm with his DeMolay chapter, and we were inseparable after that. It took seven more years before we actually got married, and by then we’d become Jewish and were well on our way to creating and strengthening our new identities together, on all levels. If someone had told me when I was 15 years old that we’d still be together happily all these years later, I’m pretty sure I would have laughed myself into another universe. At the time, I couldn’t conceive of a healthy, happy marriage, and I certainly didn’t think it would happen to me. But God had other plans for me and sent me a pretty wonderful blessing. I think I knew all along that DH was a gift from God; I just didn’t know how much of a gift he was.

Who wants to share some how-we-met stories? It doesn’t have to be romantic partners – how about close girlfriends, for example? Or anybody dear to you. Let’s close out the week with some happy vibes!

Shabbat shalom!

[hollygail]

DH#1 died from cancer; DH#2 died from a heart attack. I was going through a divorce from #3. It had been months since we'd separated. During some time in September of 1993, I was going to house sit for some friends from my congregation and went to visit them for a tour of where the dog food was kept and where and when to put the dogs out (into the back yard) and when to bring them back in... At some point during the day, I mentioned that I was getting ready to meet a man again. Later we sat down to dinner. It was one of those Formica kitchen tables. I sat along the longer part, and husband at the end to my left and his wife opposite him to my right. At one point, sort of in the middle of a conversation about I-don't-remember-what, she said (seemingly out of the blue), "Lee." I looked at her. "Lee?" said her husband (and I turned to look at him). "Lee!" she said, with a triumphant look on her face). (Think a ping-pong match and you're in the audience; my head swiveled around left, right, left...) "Lee!" he said (as my head swiveled again). At this point I interrupted: "What?" And they explained to me that there was this man from their previous congregation in Phoenix living in the northern part of San Diego County and told me some anecdotes about him from their time in Phoenix. I said to the husband (who was sitting beneath the kitchen phone on the wall (you all remember those, right?), "Call him." He said something like, sure, as soon as we're done eating, and right away I repeated, "Call him." So he did. I heard only one side of the conversation. There had been a terrible earthquake in the Los Angeles area (it made national and probably international news in the early 1990s) and his sister's house had been condemned (as had hundreds of others) and their widowed father was living with her and her husband at the time. Lee was traveling every weekend from the northern part of San Diego County to the western part of Los Angeles County to help out. He put them off. This wasn't a good time.

The dogs in question (who had given me absolutely no trouble whatsoever and I'm not exactly a dog person) used to have a terrible reaction to sudden loud noises, especially the sirens on fire engines. They'd run around, bark uncontrollably, and if there were no humans in the house at the time, they'd to nuts, including pulling down the drapes in the living room, tearing furniture, etc. As a result, this couple never went out on July 4th in the evening or New Year's Eve. So when I got a call from them in December inviting me for New Year's Eve, I wasn't that surprised. I knocked on the door and it was answered by another friend from our congregation (he and his wife lived within walking distance of the host and hostess, so I wasn't surprised). And another man was there; when I heard his name I thought, how nice that they'd included him (he had lost his wife, his business and his son all within a one-to-two-year period a few years earlier). I should mention that during this time (fall and winter of 1993), the wife of a very very very close friend of mine (from when we lived in Tucson; he and his wife had since moved to be near the Mayo Clinic; she had had cancer) was dying. He and I were as close as twins; one of us would start a sentence and the other of us would finish it. One of us would think about the other and the other would call to say "what?" So I was crying on a daily basis, feeling my friend's pain over the imminent loss of his wife (with whom I had been friends too). So I was wearing a sweat suit three sizes too large for me and hadn't combed my hair since morning (at the time, my long hair reached halfway down my back). And then? The doorbell rang again and the husband opened it. A man came in wearing a long-sleeved dress shirt and a burgundy sweater vest and dress pants (and I thought, "he's about the right age"). When this friend introduced the newest guest as "Lee," my head swiveled to his wife whose face (with a giant guilty smile) turned red. The friend I'd been sitting next to on the couch was talking to me about something and asked if I wanted to go see it; I immediately said yes and started walking toward the master bedroom where our jackets were on the bed. I kept walking through the bedroom into the bathroom as my friend asked "where are you going?" I said "they're trying to fix me up with that guy; I'm looking for a comb." She had had no idea anything like that was going on. Bottom line, he and I barely talked all night. But he too figured out that I was the one this friend had called him about that previous September. He called me two weeks later; we went to the same house where we'd met (and where the couple was baby-sitting some grandchildren for the afternoon) and when the little ones were picked up, we four went out to dinner.

The rest, as they say, is history.

[louise]

How about how I got my job. I had a very long severance package from my previous job and I decided what I wanted was to work on art books. I went through the whole 46 weeks of severance and all my unemployment. I took on a few odd jobs to get by. Then a head hunter got in touch with me about a production director job at an art book house. I applied. In the end he told me it was down to 2 people and the other person got it because they had art book experience (I had what is called "professional & reference" experience). I didn't skip a beat - I asked him who the other person worked for and immeditaely sent out a letter to that publisher. He hadn't even advertised yet. This time when I showed the beautiful books I had worked on for professional chefs (think blown sugar, etc.) I pointed out that surely these chefs were artists. Long story short, a few nights later he called and offered me the job. It was April. Being nervous I said something like "Gee, you're working late this evening." He said to me "Mah nishtanah ha lailah hazeh?". Have been working there for 25 years now.

To close the circle, the woman who did get that other job (who I replaced) is a member of my synagogue. We didn't know each other then. We have been singing together in choir for years now and btw her new job didn't work out and she is now a school teacher.

Shabbat shalom.

[lee058]

Good afternoon everybody. Hope you are all well and SAFE! Please pray for Israel.

Re today's topic: I met DH at a party. I saw him across the room; at that time he had long flaming red hair. So..... I walked across the room and introduced myself. And as was said, the rest is history.

Have a peaceful rest of the day, Lee

[gazelle18]

My future DH , in med school, lived with classmates close to my law school’s library. The library was a quiet, comfortable study venue. He picked me up there, while I was totally minding my own business!

[brgmsn]

My husband's family was the only kosher caterer in our city. When my brother's bar mitzvah was upcoming, she called him to discuss their catering it. He came to their house and saw a picture of me (I was living in an apartment since I was already 21) and she gave him my number for his unmarried son. I was NOT doing another blind date so luckily he took a while to call me. We went out in December and were engaged in April and married in October. Turns out my grandmother worked at the deli they owned for years and years. DH dated friends of mine. My folks were very friendly with my FIL's brother and SIL (although they did not speak). Total Jewish geography game!